How overused is that phrase anyway? I just really have nothing interesting to say tonight, but just thought I would put an entry on my blog just to be able to brag that I actually blogged twice in one week. I mean, I don't want Scott to lose sleep over my blog or anything.
We had our Fall Festival at church tonight. I would post pics, but have no idea how and I'm just too darn tired to even try to figure it out. But the festival was so fun, and it was such an encouragement to see how many more kids there were this year than last year. It's been really awesome to see God working at CVPC over the past year, and it's been such a blessing to be a part of it. It's so true that the more we give up the more we are blessed.
And I sooo dressed up like Sydney Bristow, and it was fun. Sometimes it's just really nice to imagine away all the stretch marks for a few hours. . .
This week has been so non stop. I was at the church every night except Mon, and I'll be back there in the morning for WIC Bible study. I am really struggling with how to recognize the line between "involved" and "over involved". I mean, I am certain that there comes a point when involvement even in the church becomes wrong if it interferes in one's ability to meet responsibilities at home. I'm trying to figure out how to recognize that point. This week was exhausting, but it just happened that several once a month events all occurred in the same week, so I feel overwhelmed, but it's not always this way. Anyway, right now I better get to sleep, or I'll sleep right through the Bible Study. . .
Well, I definitely will never get the award for most consistent blogger. My computer has been slow lately and that is highly annoying, but mostly I just haven't found the time. I suppose I ought to try to just make an entry each day if only to recollect on the day's events and try to get back in the habit of writing every day. I guess I just have a hard time thinking that anyone would want to read my daily musings. . .my life is many things, but exciting and interesting is not so much the way I would describe my daily routine. I've been very frustrated lately with the cyclical nature of my days. The constant feeling of never accomplishing anything starts to wear on me sometimes. In my heart I know that the things I do, spending time with my kids, reading to them, being available to them, matter. But sometimes I find it nearly impossible to find the motivation to fold and put away exactly the same laundry I folded and put away the day before. Or to clean the living room, knowing that in two hours there will be no evidence of my work. I'm discouraged by my own inefficiency and feel like a poor steward of my time. Must housework be an overwhelming source of oppression for me forever?
Anyway, enough moping and wallowing in self pity. The bottom line is that I am where God has called me to be and He has a plan for me. Right now that plan involves laundry. Suck it up, move on.
So I've decided that when the kids are grown and the laundry is (maybe!) caught up, I want to write a book on Rahab. I'm studying the book of Joshua right now, and I find the account of Rahab so incredibly rich. Her story serves as a wonderful picture of a Christian's life, and contains a wealth of doctrinal basis as well. I mean, think about it, out of all the people in Jericho, God chose to save Rahab. And obviously that choice was not based on her own merit. She was a harlot, to begin with. God had condemned the entire city of Jericho and it's inhabitants to destruction. Then he chose out of that city one woman, the worst of sinners, on whom to bestow His grace and mercy, and to work through her to deliver the spies to safety. It's a pretty incredible story. All of Jericho had heard of God's deeds and believed in what He was capable of. But Rahab not only heard and believed, she understood, her belief became faith and she placed her life in God's hands. She in turn put her faith into action, and then testified to God's character and accomplishments to the spies and ultimately to Joshua. God used her testimony to encourage Joshua and the Israelites as they entered the land of Canaan to take the land God had promised her. It's interesting to me that when we name great Bible heroes, we think of Joshua, Joseph, Daniel. And yet when we come to Hebrews (and James) to the "Hall of Faith", none of them are listed. But Rahab is. I think we are a little nervous about teaching our kids stories such as Rahab's, because we don't like to imply that it's okay to be a harlot or to lie. And yet, our kids will learn soon enough that all of us are harlots and liars in one way or another. And they need to understand the incredible power of God's grace. They need to understand the overwheming power of forgiveness that is based on the fact that our sins have been atoned for. I think that if we could really understand that ourselves, really own it for what it is, we would be able to love both God and others so much more genuinely. It's such a beautiful thing to know that God not only forgives our sins, but by placing our lives in His hands, we become part of His family, Israel, and that he will use us for his purposes. In Rahab's case, to become the great-great. . .grandmother of Jesus Christ. What an awesome testimony of God's grace and mercy.
Well, surprisingly enough, this is my first blog entry about my kids. I'm sure it won't be the last. I've got five of 'em. Ages 2 thru 9. Anyway, they continually surprise me. I never planned on having kids, especially not five (!) of them, so it's been a truly fascinating learning experience for me. As someone who was not a "big family" person, I never cease to be amazed at the things I am learning about big families. I always thought that if you had a bunch of kids they would resent each other and feel a lack of attention. My kids are constantly begging us for another kid. They love having five kids in the family. The older kids take such good care of the younger kids (buddy system works great!), and the younger kids adore the older ones.
Anyway, between my two sisters and I there are 11 (about to be 12 in a week or so) grandchildren ages 9 and under. You would think that the fascination with babies would start to get old. But today our pastor and his wife (my friend Mako, mentioned in an earlier post) had their second baby and we went to see them. You would have thought it was their own sibling to watch my children and how excited they were. They each had to hold him, and talked about him all day. They were so proud. But what was particularly neat was that they paid just as much attention to Naoki, the baby's 2 year old brother. As adults, we always try to make a point to remind the older child that they are still loved even though there was a new baby around. My kids seemed to just do that intuitively. Naoki seemed to really feel special. Kids are just so much more complex and capable of being more than I ever realized. I learn so much more from them than I will ever be able to teach them.
A couple of weeks ago I read a young fiction book called The Giver by Lois Lowry. (I'm reading a bunch of books that are in my oldest son's reading level so that I know what he's reading, etc. Thus, the Bronze Bow, The Giver, etc) A very general description of its premise is that memory is a key element which defines us as individuals and which creates morality for us as a culture. It's an extremely intriguing idea, and one which I believe is not contradictory to Biblical principle in a general way. I kept thinking about the fact that God created memory. He created us to remember. Why? He didn't have to do that. He could have made us however He wanted. But He chose to give us memories. I believe memory is a critical aspect of our character. It plays a key role in the way God reveals Himself to His people. Flip through the Old Testament and you will find the word "remember" repeated over and over. God was constantly reminding His people of what had happened in the past. He uses the past, memory, to help us understand His character, to assure us and comfort us regarding the future, and to reveal His perfect plan of redemption to us in a way that we can grasp it. Posessing the ability to remember also enables us to learn experientially. We are skeptical people. It is so much easier to understand and accept something with which we have past experience than it is something we know nothing of experientially. I just think it is so cool of God to create us to be so complex, and to reveal His character in such amazing ways.
Psalm 119:52 I remember your ancient laws, O LORD ,
and I find comfort in them.
Psalm 77:11 I will remember the deeds of the LORD ;
yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago
One day when I haven't spent several hours shopping for school clothes with the boys I'll write a review of The Bronze Bow, a young readers' novel which I think is highly worth reading by everyone, no matter what their age. If I ever get a tattoo, it will be of a bronze bow.
2 Samuel 22
34 He makes my feet like the feet of a deer;
he enables me to stand on the heights.
35 He trains my hands for battle;
my arms can bend a bow of bronze.
36 You give me your shield of victory;
you stoop down to make me great.
2 Corinthians 12
9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
These two verses/passages are powerful verses for me, because they both remind me that it is Christ who accomplishes everything good in my life. He equips me, trains me and empowers me to do whatever it is He has called me to do. I just need to be reminded of that a lot.